Dear Diary, Good Morning, my eyes are a bit puffy this AM. I was up till a little after 1am on the phone with B and did a lot of crying. I ended up paging him around 11:30pm since I didnt hear from him once again and he wasnt answering his new phone. He called…

Dear Diary, This jumped out at me from the thing I read the other day. From Dr Phil. Strategy: Make careful decisions and then pull the trigger. Learn that the world couldn’t care less about thoughts without actions. Talk is cheap. It’s what you do that determines the script of your life. Translate your insights,…

Dear Diary, I just got home from getting my oldest. He informed me he saw his Dad today at school? He said he drove up and talked to him briefly through the fence. Told him hes sleeping at his Aunts house, which is right at the end of the school. Bleh. So as I drove…

Dear Diary, Im so out of it in my mind today. Just not one of those days where I can seem to focus well. I got my period this AM. YAY! I always get happy to see it. Even though Im careful, condomns arent always 100% ya know? So YAY! Well I have a free…

Dear Diary, Goodmorning. Thanks Lisa for your comment. When you said go to Domestic Relations, is this the same as me going through the district attorney? I was advised by group members that I can go to the courthouse and pay 25 cents for a copy of the support order that has been done. So…

Dear Diary, Im dealing with some anger right now. At my ex. Its nothing new, and nothing new he has or hasnt done. Its just a deep anger right now. Mad that he has still avoided things. I know it will all come down on him eventually. It just pisses me off. It makes me…

Dear Diary, Goodmorning. 🙂 B is asleep in my bed right now. I was really sad again yesterday, wondering why he doesnt call, he isnt online, he now has his own phone and I dont see him? Or get a call? I was going to Moms for dinner with the kids, and sat there thinking…

As I was driving yesterday I kept seeing trucks, similar to my Ex’s. I always get nervous and think hes in town and look. I started to think about how well we were doing in the worldly sense. What kind of life we could have had. NOTICE I SAID HAD. We started from the bottom,…

Dear Diary, As I was writing the last one I saw Ex’s screen name log on. Its been almost a week since I emailed him and no response. So I finally got one, it means shit though as usual. “I’m sorry that i have not been able to send you any money for your suport…

Dear Diary, Darnit, woke up at 7:30 am both days I get to sleep in and I couldnt get back to sleep. Been in bed and watched some Bev Hills 90210 reruns. I used to love watching that show. B got in last night and we spoke online. He said he was feeling blah, wasnt…