bleh Morning

Dear Diary, Morning. I still feel kinda bleh. I think I just feel a lot of uncertainty, confusion perhaps? Its not that anything has exactly HAPPENED to ME. But its just everything around me? The feeling to move is one aspect, the ex returning, wondering where this relationship between B and I will go or…

Concerned

Dear Diary, Just have a lot on my mind today. I have a online type support group also. Ive kept quiet about B, guess Im afraid to say anything? I doubt my reaction? I dont know. So I guess this entry is just a sort of putting out of all the things I feel about…

Home Alone

Dear Diary, Just got home. Later then I expected. Was dropping kids off at 6:30 with Mom so she could drive them to courthouse for visitation with Dad at 7. The kids asked today why are they going there. My mother already told me if they asked her she would tell them the truth “This…

Pastrami?

Dear Diary, Something just clicked with me. Its miniscule sounding, but it connected. Last night we stopped in a drive through. Im picky about what I have on my food. So we ordered burgers. 2 different kinds. I had a bacon with beef, he had pastrami and beef(B that is) So when we got back…

Grrrr Why Here?

Dear Diary, Well Im feeling a little bit better so far today. 🙂 I just lounged around at home after work and in the eve. Uneventful but that was ok. I really just wanted to be ALONE. And the kids of course are in every few minutes talking and with something else to say. Im…

Becoming What We Hate

Dear Diary, Was just reading this.. thought it was very good. From this site Romeo’s Bleeding. http://www.obgyn.net/displayarticle.asp?page=/yw/articles/Romeopart6 Nobel Peace Prize recipient Elie Wiesel tells a wonderfully haunting story of how he almost became what he hated. He spent part of his adolescence growing up in the Nazi concentration camp at Auschwitz. One night, he was…

My Trip

Dear Diary, Well my mood is really sucky today. Not the way I wanted to start my entry after my time away. But my ex is in Cali. I found out last night when the kids spoke to him. He told them hes trying to find a place in the neighboring town. Last week when…