Dear Diary, Just wanting to do a practice letter of what I want to say, just get a feel if I even want to I guess. Dear B, Heres how I feel, cut to the chase, cut past the bullshit, heres what I want. Ugh, I started to type a list of things I want,…
Do you wish to stay locked in the world where she is? Holding tight to Loneliness, saying its your old Friend? Selfishness, Unavailability, Indifference Are these really what makes you feel alive? The words ring over and over She followed you through the halls Begging for answers, begging for love. Asking WHY? “Im working on…
Dear Diary, Woa, had a bad side effect to the Xenadrine after I wrote earlier. My vision was all blurry, spotty, then sorta like rippling water. I did write B and he told me to eat quite a bit and drink a lot of water. If it persisted worst scenario he said throw it up….
Dear Diary!!!!!!!!! EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE Here I am having a hard time with answering an email!!!!!!!!! B has written me a few times, asking me how im feeling, asking me when Jen is flying in. Im very brief with him, to the point, havent mentioned a word about last night, I didnt call him after he logged…
Dear Diary, Eeeeks. Think I got somewhat of a glimpse into what drug use is like! I had a hell of a night. I was up till 6am! And not wanting to be! And not doing anything. Plus I was highly emotional. It was a usual night, nothing big, playing online, watching tv. B called…
Dear Diary, I want to write in here, but I dont have the patience right now or focus to sit here and pour out all of it. Im angry and pissed today. Im angry at what I have allowed to happen. Im angry for accepting things Im not happy with, Im angry that Ive been…
Dear Diary, Been a sorta weird Saturday for me. I felt good first part of the day. Then started to miss B later part and be sad. I struggle with that part a lot. This is just one of those entries where Im just letting out a bunch of crap. Just cause I want to….
Dear Diary, Happy Saturday Afternoon! Its so nice out here today! I went and mowed the back lawn (part of it is sooo scary!) It got so tall with foxtails and its hard on the mower I never finished, then we had some rain, and well I started but mower ran out of gas, bleh,…
Dear Diary, Morning. I feel a little a little bleh. I had a talk with B last night, and ultimately I think it was a great conversation. But it also brought up sadness within me. I basically opened up about my desire for female friendships, and the lack of time I have with him, and…
Dear Diary, I wrote B a letter this AM, he just wrote me back. Dang Im all freakin emotional this AM, like really bad, and its so not PMS time. I dunno whats up with me. Ive been having to keep wiping away tears from my eyes n stuff. And I just had a brief…