Divorce Stuff

Dear Diary,

Ahhhh, get to leave early today since kiddo didnt have school.

My girlfriend D called me yesterday as it was her day at the courthouse to go over Visitation and all. Now mind you she is on monitored visitation, paying $300 a week to see her children.

So she said that he agreed to….

1. She gets the kids wednesdays from 2-7pm. And her husband can be present.
2. She gets the kids every other weekend from Fri eve till Sunday eve. BUT, her husband cant be there. (WTF?)And he has to get them sunday AM for church and bring them back after, she cannot take them to her church.
3. No more monitor

So thats it where it stands, basically it wasnt a day in court but a day where they had their attnys go back and forth and talk to try and come to some type of agreement in the meantime until this goes to trial. Now to write up the papers on it. I told her this was a good start, compared to where it was and I so remember all this, when you are dealing with an abusive controller, you take what you can get that they will agree to otherwise they will call it all off and you are stuck where you were. But how retarded her husband cant even be there.

So there is now and attny for the children who was present and she said the monitored visits were uneccessary and the attny said that she was very impressed by D as a mother and really likes her.

So she said afterwards the attny said to her “D, I just want to tell you, I dont know what you want to do, but it will cost you a lot of money, but I can get you those kids, and get that man to have the monitored visitation, I think he has a screw loose”

See this was my old attorney who did a good damn job with dealing with my ex, but I just had to be patient for the legal process to get rolling and soon enough things happened and my ex got smacked in the face for all his garbage.

So D says “Vicky, I have money in that house of ours Im entitled too, I can say goodbye to that money and let it pay for the attorney” I told her I agreed, if it means getting your children back, forget the house!”

Then she said “He just scares me, I dont know what he will do next, he went and found my husbands ex wife and got together with her to dig up dirt on him and me also, he brought in some letter from her! It was like reading a White Trash novel talking about how she was pregnant at 16 and he cheated on her! They werent even married, what the heck?”

Her next court date will be in Nov or so as they are changing judges here and dont want them seeing the old judges who dont care and are on their way out, Want a regular judge to see this case.

Well the word with my neighbors once again is they are moving and selling, I ran into the husband sunday eve at the park. I havent seen anyone at the house at all since last Friday or so. The lights are on the back porch which is annoying and shines in my kitchen all night long, the lawn is severly overgrown and the grass is dying. He put the trash out this last week thats overflowing and wasnt picked up which means it must not be paid.

Sad 🙁

Ive still be emailing with his sister, we got into a big talk about Paxil and antidepressants, as I read some article on a Lawsuit being filed by people who have been taking Paxil and feeling suicidal. Well next thing you know she writes me back telling me how she took it after getting married and she basically dealt with all the stuff and suicidal thoughts and said being weaned off it was like any other drug withdrawl, she wont go near the stuff again and did not have anything good to say about it.

So we were just talking about coping with lifes stresses and dealing with them and how we do so.

She has a girlfriend she said that has totally changed since getting on meds and not for the better.

Im anxious to go to my counselor again, I called my middle sister today as she was having some freaking out irritable stuff last week and was gonna see her therapist, just left her a message.

Dang was I like this when I was married to my ex also? It just seemed like my mind was so much more simpler back then, but my life was simple in many regards also, but seems there was always an underlying bad sense, but I just accepted things for so long in my marriage, the good and the bad, the abuse.

Damn how vivid memories can be, asking my husband if we could read the Bible together, mind you he was a youth pastor and I wanted family devotional time, we were renting a room and he verbally went NUTS. I was about 6 mos pregnant, it was in the eve, and he yelled “Lets get a divorce!” and I was mortified, my mind hadnt even thought of divorce nor did I believe in it nor was that even what I wanted, I was crying so so hard, damn that was painful, wild how vivid some old memories can be? I was crying so hard and feeling nauseus, sitting on the floor next to the toilet gagging as he is still yelling at me, I said “STOP STOP” and finally got up, walked across the hall to wake the guy we rented from and asked him to help him calm down, to which he did.

Yuck, and I didnt even dare think of leaving in those days, I was just so devastated hed say such a thing when I was carrying his baby.

Gotta go for now