Playing Mental Games on Kids
Dear Diary,
I need to add one more thing, mostly for personal reference of things I put a lot of facts here.
My ex bought clothes for the kids a few visits back, but would only let them where these clothes when they saw him. Which I found utterly ridiculous. I pack them clothes. He isnt paying any support, so couldnt he at least let them wear them or take them home since he isnt paying shit right now? They are nice clothes, but only for there weekends with him. Like they have to look a certain way when he has them? My stuff isnt good enough?
So last time the kids came home in the clothes but said “Mommy we have to give these back” I told them the clothes are for them to wear whenever they want, and its ok, they can just wear them when they go to see him again or take them then. I could not find the outfit my oldest had all week to even wash it. So I go to pack his bag friday and I find my son had already packed the outfit. He had put it somewhere all those 2 weeks and did not ever wear it nor did he give it to me to wash. So yesterday I told them to unpack all their dirty clothes so I can wash them. My oldest was laying clothes out all strange in the living room, there were 3 pairs of shorts I did not recognize. I said “Hun Im going to wash the clothes, he said “These 3 are DADS” and I said “I know but its ok for me to wash them, did you wear them?” He just would ignore me, he had them folded like they were precious treasures you do not touch. I once again told him “Hun its ok, you can wear those in the meantime until you see Dad again, and its ok for Mom to wash them” He didnt respond and he didnt throw them in the laundry.
This is the weird stuff Im talking about??? I said to my Mom “Why does he tell them this shit? “Here these are MY CLOTHES to wear when you are with me” But then sends them home with them? Yet tells them they are HIS? I said “Mom is this like his way of showing some control or saying hes helping or Look at what I bought them?” She said she believes it is. Its weird. My little one could care less and just wore the clothes last time, and I notice he didnt come back with any of his new stuff. But my oldest came back with nice new clothes. But he is all protective of them.
How does one handle this mental shit? Its like you dont help us with anything, I bought all their school clothes this year, If you want clothes just for your place then keep them there. And I wont pack them anything, I dont get it at all.
::Sigh::
The cleaning lady at work said to me today “Your babies are precious” There pic is on my monitor. She doesnt have the best english but she said to me “Take care of those babies and God will bless you” And next thing you know she tells me “God is the father to those who dont have a father around, and how if you teach them in the right way God will bless you” I said “Are you a christian?” She said “Yes, you?” and she mentioned Jesus. She was very sweet. So it was kind of a cool moment.
Well, back to work