Head on Straight

Dear Diary,

Well shortly after my last entry I heard another person call in on the radio. The questions and responses are just hitting me today.

They were saying basically “You dont need to figure out why you are doing what you are doing to change it, we get too hung up on all that and dont do anything”

Also placing expectations on our partners when how are we holding up our end of the relationship?

I have a man who loves me.

I have a man whos willing to make changes and better himself in order for us to move forward.

I have a man who drove out this weekend, who wanted to help me paint and was more then willing to go along with me to pick out paint colors, to sit around and mask off things and cut plastic to cover the carpet, to spend his weekend in my hallway painting my house.

Who picked up the tab on groceries and then came home to prep the BBQ and prepare our food. Who whipped up waffle mix and put in fresh bananas to make us waffles to enjoy.

Hes truly been awesome.

Hes trying to find ways to merge things for us to be “Together” the very thing Im crying out for yet trying to ruin in the same token.

Leaving him wont help me figure things out, it will just allow me to push away once again from commitment and a person who really loves me and to go throw myself into someone else and men who are dysfunctional when I have one before me who wants to make changes.

Is he perfect? NO

Am I? NO

But hes more then willing to walk with me and try to compromise and accomodate me.

I really need to get my head on straight…….