Take A Hammer

Dear Diary,

Im sitting here listening to my little ones tape player in the background. He is asleep now.

I dont remember if I wrote this, but Mom In Law sent a tape certified mail last week, said in a letter the kids need to learn these songs to sing at their Great Grandpas 80th Bday. And she underlined PLEASE make sure they learn these songs and they are going to sing them with their second cousins.

I had to go through the tape first to make sure there were no messages on her from it since she does weird stuff to begin with.

I just find this whole thing odd.

I have been a part of this family for 12 yrs. And in all my time in that family they have never had a sing a long thing, and especially with THIS many songs. And then to have all the kids who live all in different cities learn them then come together?

And as I said to B. Its not a horrible thing, but Ex’s family are not very Mary Poppins Like. My children are the most reserved of the whole bunch. They are very sheltered and protected and Im very watchful of them. So Im really trying to imagine this family all teaching there kids these songs separately and the kids all in sync that day for it?

And its not just one song. Its like 5 or so. And the tape has

Sing a Song by the Carpenters

We are Family

Dont Worry Be Happy

Back in the Saddle

And I just sit here, this will be my first time not attending Great Grandpas birthday. Its not that I will miss the event. Its just that part of my life. It is sad to think I will not be a part of it, yet at the same time I dont want to be a part of it if that makes any sense?

But to listen to We are Family and be told as the Ex who has cut off contact with the In Law to teach the kids these songs for a party that I wont be at. It bugs me.

I said to B “We are family” its like weird for me

here teach the kids this song, you know the same kids I said are sexually acting out and have them memorize about 6 diff songs and join up with all their second cousins and sign it together ? its sorta painful in a way, having me teach them we are family if that makes sense.

He replied “its irony”

Its like this is stuff their Dad needs to do with them. Bleh

Wants to go take Hammer to the tape…