Onto Other things…

Dear Diary,

With the other stress I was dealing with I couldnt write much else. Im still upset over the scenario to some degree. Will take me some time to chill out and not feel bad for speaking up.

Its that whole doubting yourself garbage you know?

Like when I feel something is wrong Im confused sometimes if it is wrong and am I making a big deal. But for people who know me in real life, its rare I have to ahve a confrontation sit down unless something is REALLY wrong.

Anyways, Im doing better on the homefront, thank goodness! Need to have some stable emotions somewhere right?

Feeling a little more better with B, and the whole other stuff Im letting go of, Ive felt better past 2 days about you know who. Letting go or not thinking so much about the past.

I was in the restroom yesterday at the gym, there is this girl whos been there about as long as I have, and shes attractive, blonde, tan, nice body, she has tattoos on her arms, but shes pretty but seems a little tough, I guess its the Harley Davidson tatt that does that!LOL

But in all the years there I have never spoken to her, but couldnt help but overhear a convo she was having with another woman, they were discussing how there were no men worth dating in the area! Haha, I recall having these conversations at the gym with Gym Buddy many times!

So I had to jump in, and I find out she is going through a divorce, Im not sure what happened, she just said her husband changed and she cant believe hes doing this to her, so Im gathering he wanted out or had an affair. She made mention of mid life crisis.

So shes in the dating scene again so we all talked, we talked about the men out here. She described looks wise what kinda guy shes attracted too(and it fits You know whos description) what is funny is these two look so well together, I have thought that for so long, they just have that look, before I knew either of them I figured shed be his type of woman.

Anyways, shes all “Well its important stuff these days like “Hey do you have a car? DO you drive? Do you have a job?”

So it was just fun talking girl talk for sometime, she works for the school system, the one around hte corner from You know whos place! The best school in teh district, so her kids are going there now. Anyways, its just weird once you finally meet someone and hear them talk, shes not what I thought or imagined I guess. She was actually quite cool and friendly.

I worked out and did arms with the guys. I will probably go today except if its back day I will have to skip that and be careful. The pain I have is on my right hand side below my shoulder blade. Its not a terrible pain but just kinda nagging, when I was intimate with B the other night and on my back it hurt more. Just something about the pressure and angling.

I cleaned up the bedroom last night as its so cluttered since B moved in, his back was bothering him also and he slept on the heating pad. He is afraid the sciatic pain is flaring up again. 🙁

I just really want to get out today, get to the gym and blow off some steam, some time on the treadmill with the walkman will be helpful and I brought some of my books to read! Forgot them yesterday.

Well Im out for now, laterrrrrrrrrr