Friday

Dear Diary,

Hiya,

YAY ITS FRIDAY! Thank goodness!

Im supposed to be looking up info for a trip for B and I over Thanksgiving but Im not into it right now. I really need to eat something with protein as I feel bleh.

Anyways, Im home, kids are home, we already went by the cemetery as I showed the kids where “I” was buried.

We walked around some, I went over to the front of the cemetery where someone else I knew was buried. My old next door neighbors daughter. She was killed in a freak horse riding accident. She got thrown off a horse and it snapped her neck she died instantly. But she left behind a 5 yr old daughter. Who then lived with her grandparents across the street and I babysat and have seen over the years. I took her to the cemetery as a kid as nobody would talk to her about her mom or take her. It was sad when I went because they didnt even have a plot for her Mom. All she has was a little circle and a number on it, no gravestone. Well when we went today she finally got a stone! YAY! So now shes not some little number, I wonder who got it.

We then went by the video store. I got the kids the Superman movie from the 80s was it? To see.

Im so glad its friday! YAY! No homework, I can clean up house and get more stuff on ebay!

The kids need to clean their rooms and bathrooms this weekend, thats their chores and the bathrooms look gross.

We went to my sons thanksgiving program last night, they had a soup dinner with it.

These are the things I DO like about the private school, the types of activities and events and things they have. The gymnasium was set up with tables. and drinks and programs and all Thanksgiving looking. And all the grades were doing things, then they had a display table of all the dolls the kids just made for Social Studies on their family of origin.

The kids were all happy and excited. My ex’s aunt came in and said Boo and put her arms on my shoulders. She came and sat with Me, my Mom and she met B, We all had soup and pie.

The program was cute.

It was just nice, B was quiet, but he did good, its just kinda bleh sometimes, feels awkward, but I know he does also. Its just cause hes so quiet and unmoved by things.

I thanked him though for coming when we got home.

Kids had a good time.

I talked to my middle sister yesterday.

We talked about how B and I were doing, and how she and her husband were when they first got together.

See my sister was married and owned a house, then her husband died during an asthma attack. Her first husband had financial troubles and was a spender. My sis was the more money manager type. Well she met her second husband, they dated, he moved in before they married. She said he didnt help at all around the house, he just seemed to not care, he wasnt really motivated to do much around the house. And I made mention of how my therapist said that even though we are “Together” Its still my house and its usually different when a couple gets a home together.

My sister said “Wow, now that I think about it, thats when it changed” She said how her first house they lived in it for awhile, but it was so attached to the memory of her first husband and it was hers and in her name, not until they sold it and got THEIR House after they were married did she say that changed, and plus having children, she said really after the second child was born he got more involved. So she said we sound much like the way her and her husband are.

I was thinking last night about kids, during the assembly, about if B had a child, I think having your own does something different to you you know? Not that Im saying he should have one. But I wonder how having a child would affect him. I think if I said I wanted to have a kid with him hed say Okay, he seems to go along with whatever I want. Who knows, I just dont know that I want to have another. So, its not really an issue at this point.

Its nice to think of my kids being raised and grown in the next 10 yrs. Granted I mean they will be adults, doesnt mean they will be responsible and grown! Ha!

Well gonna go for now, Im starving!