Bye Bye Counselor

Dear Diary,


Ahhhh, its friday! YAY!

Well my cell rang yesterday, since my peak hour minutes were up, I dont answer unless I have to, it was my ex. Whats he calling for? Hes to get the kids thurs, so for him to call that early when kids arent home I figured it was for me. So I played it after 8pm last night. He says something about how his vehicle broke down in LA, he cant get back up here to get the kids friday, and some other things I cannot make out that he says, then says he can get them Sat AM at my moms at 10am.

Ahhh ya just gotta go with it you know? He already backed out of one weekend, he doesnt see them for a month, tells me he will take them all of Sept. Then cancels one weekend(He has 3 weekends extra to make up) and now he cant get them today, well at least he called right?

So in some ways its okay with me, sure I like my alone time, but at the same time I dont mind the kids there another day either. So?

I went to counseling yesterday, I had not been since JUNE! I did not realize it was that long! I tell her B moved in and she was all ???????? He moved in? Doesnt he live and work like far? and shes all WOW.

We got all caught up. I did discuss male sexual drive at the end, saying that really at this point, that really only being the issue I see us possibly having? LOL then he all came after me last night, go figure?

Anyways, at the end she says “I have something to tell you” And informs me shes leaving and moving. SO its my last session with her, Ive been seeing her pretty much since my support group and therapist left the domestic violence shelter, so its been what? 2 yrs or so? I dont even know. In some ways, Im glad, I think its time for change, Ive had different therapists at different stages in my life, and I felt like I just go in and talk but she doesnt offer much? Not that a therapist should tell you what to do, but I dont know, I guess I wanted someone with more enthusiasm and that challanges me some and was thinking I needed to switch anyways, WELL! Its done! She put me in for a transfer with another lady the end of Oct. So Ill see how she is. But the sucky part is I cannot take the kids to this one, she told me she has no idea how that will work since my therapist worked with kids and families and the other ones she knows do not, and I was lucky we had a family person who knew all of us.

So on that end it will be starting over from scratch, but thats okay, change is good. At least I feel good about that change, and I hugged her goodbye, perhaps I should get her some flowers? 🙂 She will be there till Oct 27th she said.

She said she was also glad to hear that my story had a good close, as far as B moving in and finding that out before she left. She said as I was leaving “You two have been together and been through a lot together, its good to hear this”

I even had her laughing telling some of the stories of my children.

So I got in last night with the kids, was on the computer, B got in and was all “Whats for dinner?” we didnt have much left, I was hungry and irritable, I was thinking of his toe nails on the dresser, wondering why hes asking me for dinner, I had enough eggs, so made the kids breakfast for dinner, but was just enough for the kiddos, but B and I had to fend for ourselves, I wasnt in the mood to cook either. So I was irritable, I started to get cranky, walked in the kitchen and was just going to make a can of soup, was slamming the pots and pans. I was not in a good mood for the eve.

Well I head back to the office and he comes walking out and puts his arms around me and hugs me. He then walks in the kitchen, and he says he will make some fresh spinach, and we made up some crinkle cut fries. Yes I eat spinach now! I never ate spinach, unless it was in some salad someone made me. B sauteed it in olive oil, this sauce dressing he got at Costco, sesame something and then with Lemon pepper! Its actually good! We sat and ate a plate of Spinach! LOL and then a plate of fries. Haha, that was dinner, and it was fine with both of us. I picked up a dark chocolate bar at the health food store when I got some cream for my youngest( I think he has ringworm )

This kid is prone to every weird skin pimple rash thing, hes healthy otherwise, but this stuff, even my ex commented “He gets the gnarliest stuff!” Hes started to get a little tiny bit of acne so Ive been on him about washing his face, and awhile back he had like a boil or whatever it was under the skin, it was gross! It got huge, hard, went to the dr and they gave me antibiotics and we had to put a steam cloth on it to help it open and drain. My ex finally took care of it and pinned him down to pop it(eww thank god I was not there my son screams when you touch that stuff) Then he got another weird one under his armpit, my ex picks at every little bump or what have you, so he said it popped. To be honest it looked like a mole, but now the dark spot is gone.

So I may need to go into the dr again with him, got on him about face and hand washing and keeping his nails trimmed and to stop picking at his scabs, hes spreading germs.

So when he leaves Ill n eed to rewash his laundry again, and I want to buy some more lysol and spray the house.

I got a rash on my arm by my elbow, and its not gone away which is uncommon, its similar to what I get when I pet a cat, etc. But whats triggering it for a week? So Im beginning to wonder if its something else? Or if its the pet rat? She really needs to be put down or something, she has something growing on the side of her face, and Im not going to pay to have it removed on a $2 rat thats at its end. But shes still eating fine and herself, so I feel bad. Ive had 2 other rats in the past that had tumors so its not uncommon. And all of my rats when they hit the end of their lives usually go pretty fast. But at the same time I dont want the kids touching her anymore, and when I do I thoroughly wash myself up.


So last night my mood perked up after Bs hug and making dinner. My grumpys were gone. I wrote up his portion of the bills. I looked at it, I had his half of the mortgage, kiddos tuition, electric, phone, water, and it came to $465! LOL I know thats freakin cheap compared to where he used to live, granted theres other bills that come along in the month but they arent here yet, gas bill, cable/internet, trash, but all in all the large ones are out of the way. I gave him a sheet and he wrote me a check right there. WHEW! LOL Now that wasnt so hard was it? So I had the check, in the memo he wrote “Sexual Favors” with a smiley face!!!!!!!!! 🙂

Im all “B!!!!!!!!! I have to take this to the bank with this written on it!!!!!!” Hes all “What???” giving me a hard time, he was totally in a mood last night I could tell, spanking my behind in the kitchen, touchy feeely when I was around. Im all “Can I get in trouble? With a check saying that??” LOL hes all “Nooo, just say its a joke” I want to cross over it to be honest.

He was up late, playing his game online, I got in bed and watched tv, wondered when he was coming to bed as he seemed spunky all eve. Which hes typically not a late nite sex dude.

Well he came to bed, and around midnight, well the magic happened. 🙂

And Im not broke anymore! LOL I went from $54 to last me for 2 weeks, to $475! After he paid his half of things. YAY! Now just have to keep some of that aside for the mortgage payment. So maybe I can go get that bookshelf after all!

The guy was coming over to work on the shower today.


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