Finished Book

GoodMorning Diary,

Wow my youngest is still in bed. 🙂 Its quiet and nice.

Oldest had a rought night though. Hes been perky and in good shape through all of this. UNTIL LAST NIGHT.

He walked into my office about 8pm and stood there in the doorway, kids were watching tv in the front room about ready for bed.. He said “Mom, I forgot to tell you. I had a bad dream last night. I exploded” and tears came streaming out of my 10 yr olds eyes, And he hugged onto me. It was sad, cute and funny all at the same time. I just hugged him and asked him “Why did you blow up?” Hes all “Because of my chicken pox” and I reassured him that it wont make him explode. He just had to be hugged. I asked him if he wanted to take a bath, he was super emotional. He said No. I told him it was just a dream and not real and that that wouldnt happen.

He came back about 5 min later, stood in the doorway and said “Ok Mom, Im over it, can I take a bath?” I started up an oatmeal bath for him, he seemed okay after he got out and relaxed again. Little one on the other hand was fine and kept asking me what was up with his brother.

Well oldest cried again, cried in bed, was saying “I HATE MY LIFE” I ended up telling him he could watch tv onthe couch as he could not sleep. He quited down then.

I woke up at 3am to him whining out loud in the front room with the light still on. I was so tired, and told him I was sorry he could not sleep but he also couldnt just yell out and wake everyone else up unless he having an emergency or something. I asked him if he wanted a bath, tv? the light ona nd to read a book. He said NO, and after I went back to bed I didnt hear a peep from him.

I had told him to think positive things and take deep breaths, that crying and saying “I hate my life” just make you feel worse. He seems okay this AM.

I said to B online last night “Want to have a book date with me?” and he said yes. Last night we finished “Hollywood Animal” The Memoir of Joe Estherhaze.

I was quite shocked by the ending of the book. How his life has changed. I even choked up a few times.

See the book is so full of fun and fame, and money, drugs, parties, premiers, situations with famous people, his affairs, end of his marriage, drama with his kids, new wife, new children… Book also goes over his childhood, he is Hungarian, and later in life it turned out his father was a war criminal, Write Nazi proprangda and hid it…. how his mother had what appeared to be mental illness and dealing with her,,,,

And then he and his second wife decided Malibu isnt where they wanted their kids raised. The moved to Ohio, to buy a home and raise the kids, near a lake.

Well he had been to a celebrity Ear Nose and Throat dr, over problems with his throat. Dr. Said he had polyps on his vocal cords. He didnt need to have them removed until they bothered him.

Well they were bothering him and he was losing his voice, went to a Dr in Ohio, who said “Those arent polyps, those are tumors, you have throat cancer” He didnt believe the guy, saw another dr, who told him the same. So he then saw another dr, who said they were pre cancerous and he needed them removed ASAP.

But as a result his larynx would be removed, he would have a feeding tube for rest of his life and loose his voice.

He was all NO WAY.

SO hes in his 60’s. With 4 little boys, a new wife and they just moved away from Hollywood life and hes got Cancer.

His wife stayed by his side and the dr tried a surgery he never used before, reattaching some muscles or whatever to see if he could make it so he could still speak, swallow, etc.

OH! But wait, see this guy had been smoking since he was 12, and drinking since he was 14. So they needed him to quit, he also had to go through detox, because they couldnt do the surgery due to his health.

And the Dr said “You have to quit smoking, if I do this surgery, you have to promise me this, if you smoke again, you will die”

He made the promise

After surgery he had a tube in his throat, they have to suction it out daily. Was pretty nasty and graphic, he was in the hosptial for some time, they taught his wife how to clean and place the tube back in, he was on liquid diet through the tube, it was a success though, he could swallow.

He had to write on a Magna Doodle his wife got him during recovery.

He talked about how great his wife was and was there by his side.

He could no longer drink and smoke, The cravings were there for a LONG time and really bad. He couldnt go to certain places, listen to music, sit on a chair, watch tv certain times of day,,, you name it, everything made him want to smoke or have a drink.

He took up walking, and soon was up to 5 miles a day.

He said one day he was walking,a nd sweating badly and felt h orrible, his heart racing, bugs were around his trach tube in his throat… and he just sat on the curb and began to cry.

He said probably all his life he never really even knew who he was between alcohol and nicotine… and now he was clean…. and he prayed to God to help him, he told God right there on the curb he needed him and his help, and that he would make better of his life and speak out against smoking.

And from that day forward, he changed. Was pretty cool. He started going to church with his wife, they now go to church, say prayers with the children, said they are the poster child for Family Values.

Yes here sits the guy who wrote Basic Instinct and Show Girls, and hes in church and has little kids, and isnt fooling around on his wife, and is against smoking.

So that pretty much is his campaign now. Hes been writing to Hollywood people but without much success. About films and smoking. He filled his movies with smoking and found it sexy.

So it was really cool you know?

I looked everywhere to rent Telling Lies in America. I couldnt find it anywhere, so found it online and I can buy it for 75 cents plus shipping on Half.com! haha. So I will need to order it.

This film is partially autobiographical of a point in his life, and then other parts spun off into fiction. He also has another film that closely resembles what happened with his Father, I believe that one is called “The Music Box”

He was talking at the end of the book of even wanting to make a film about Jesus…

Mel Gibson beat him to it….

Well its a great book, very fascinating, I recommend it.

I think B and I were sad its over, we poured over this book alot together, I think I will need to find another one for us to read.

It rained here last night, I was all shocked to hear as the day was so sunny. So this AM everything is nicely watered and the sun is out again…

Later

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