My Nite with New Friends

Dear Diary,

Well its about 1am. Sunday AM now.

Im at home, all by myself. 🙂

I have had a nice weekend so far. I went to the gym after work friday, B even wrote me an email to see when I was arriving and should he go to train because he would rather spend time with ME! I said I was going to the gym, normally I just revolve around him and put anything else aside if I can be with him, but Im changing that. So I went to the gym, then went to drop kids bags off at moms for my ex to pickup after getting the kids from school, well he arrived early and shortly after I did, so I was still there. So the kids came in and hugged me, my ex went on at the door with my mom showing off some cut to his hand and getting sympathy. Hes like a little kid with a Comehere and kiss it boo boo. Just wanting attn. Well I walked over and said Hi to him, he rarely sees me in person. Well I honestly believe he was stalling, as they all left, and he kept trying to make convo over the kids with me, then after they left he came back to the door and ended up in my moms living room sitting across from me. But I finally had to cut him off since there really was no reason for him to discuss my little ones behavior again. I already told him about it, so it was kinda weird what ex was doing and putting my little one on the spot in front of me and my mom and his brother when Id already covered it with ex. So they finally left, I then went home showered, packed my bag, then drove the pup to the pound. They said she was malnourished and about 4 mos old. So Im on the list for first dibbs if nobody claims her. They said June 5th is the day and gave me a sheet with her ID info. So we shall see what happens!

I then headed to B’s place. I got there and he was just getting ready to shower, he went to Ju Jitsu, so I was fiddling around with my stuff and he yells out “Arent you going to come talk to me?” Aweee, while he was showering so I came over and hung out in the doorway. It was just nice. We had a nice time, he showered, we talked, he told me I looked very nice. 🙂

We were going out to dinner, well he was going to dress nice for me but his nice clothes were dirty, so he then pulled out some jeans and they barely fit him, so he was really whiney about his weight, about being fat, he went on and on this weekend about his size right now. I understand when you are unhappy with your weight, and to be honest I love him however he is and find him sexy still. But I know it bugs him, but my god enough about it already.

He holds my hand when we drive anywhere, which is sweet, he will put it out for me to hold.

We had a nice dinner, it tasted sooo good! mmmmm and we each had a drink. We sat and talked and he talked more, I was quiet, I just didnt have much to say, and its nice to hear him talk and tell stories.

We drove home and he ended up telling me a story about him drinking when he was younger and blacking out and this party etc etc. Then we shared scariest moment of your life stories. He did Crystal Meth he said when he was a senior in high school, and some wild story about a guy with a sawd off shot gun, and being on drugs, and going home and staying in there for a day and half curled up in a ball in the corner of his bed. Just wild stuff he has been through.

We got back to his place and curled up in bed and were not up very long and went to sleep, it was just nice to curl up with him.

OH! By the way! Friday as I was leaving the gym, my gym buddy walked me out and had already bought the tickets for the rodeo sat! And didnt want me to pay him. So I said “So who is single?” meaning out of the 6 of us going. I didnt think anyone was married” He says “Im married” I just stood there, thinking , HES KIDDING!

I said “Seriously?” hes all “Yeah Im married” Im like.. ???? Hes all “Youve seen her” And then it clicked, just about 2 mos ago, Ive seen a woman come in the gym in street clothes and talk to him and take him to the chiropractor once. He has never introduced her to me though, and we have been working out together for over a yr now and I swear to God he has never mentioned being married! Or have a woman in his life, a wife, nothing.

And Ive not seen a ring or else I just didnt notice? But honestly I havent seen one.

So as we are walking away he is walking me to my Jeep. And I said “I had no idea, is this your first marriage?” hes all “Yeah” Im all “Wow, really?” cause he has grown kids. So I just stopped there, and hes all “Go on, ask me more questions” And I was like Oh no its ok. I was like ???? Why would he say that? He just said “My wife, has the curly hair, shes like you, her hair, you both love sweets,you should talk to her”

I left feeling weird, Just kinda in shock, I mean I had no idea he had a wife!

Ok so back to my weekend, so B and I slept in this AM till about 10am. It felt sooo good, we cuddled, and massaged eachother, and talked, then he got up on my back and got massage oil and gave me a back and leg massage, 🙂 He doesnt do that much, so it was nice. I felt so pampered. We laid around a lot just snuggling, touching, talking, and I wasnt really feeling sexual, but we were half dressed just underwear on all AM. So about 11:30 we got all close and kissing, and made love. Ahhh I swear that guy, it doesnt take much and Im so turned on. 🙂

Then we laid there awhile more, and then went to shower. we scrubbed eachother like we always do, our little ritual. 🙂 And then got ready and went to lunch. It was just a nice day, I had a different approach, to just not be negative or take everything he says so personal. I feel I have to change my attitude somewhat afterthe counseling talk about the negativity we are feeding to eachother.

We got back and I was so full, so it was warm and I kicked my pants off, and he took his shirt off and we got comfy and talked a little then watched tv, I was feeling sleepy again and laid my head on his tummy/lower abdomen, and he just played with my hair, running his hands thru it, oooooh I love that, its so relaxing and I was falling asleep, I twitched a few times and he thought he hurt me, was pulling my hair. Im all “No Im falling asleep” He said go right ahead, and I dozed off for 20 min or so. It was just so nice. We watched Discovery channel on methods of death for criminals/punishment. They went over the Crucifixtion, And we got talking about Jesus, I was sharing a lesson and things I learned in church. I may still have the sheet somewhere but it was like a medical examiners explanation of christs death on the cross, how a person died of suffocation, about him sweating blood, etc etc. That these were all explanable.

Well we got into this in depth talk about Jesus and God and B was saying he believes theres a God, but hes not so sure about this whole Jesus/Christianity thing, and we basically had this talk where he feels that the story of Jesus dying for our sins but being God is BS. And that if God is all knowing of our lives and what we will do why would he punish us for it, etc etc. Basically a lot of things applying to predestination, free will, etc etc.

I could only say things as I understand them. We had a good talk, and I told him I can only say so much, that its Faith. And that I cannot explain everything about God as my mind cant wrap around it all, but that there are some good books on the topics he asked me about.

So it made for a interesting discussion, and I was praying afterwards thanking God for the opportunity to have the discussion with B. As its been awhile. And I appreciate the way B and I can talk but not argue and just throw things back and forth, and then just hug or go about things, its not this matter of each saying SEE IT MY WAY, but each person sharing what they believe, feel, know, etc.

I really wanted to flake on my rodeo event, I wanted to just stay with B, but I made myself go. And so I left B’s about 5pm. I then came home, got ready and headed to the fairgrounds for the rodeo, I was about 15 min late, but he had us all meet there an hour early to hang out etc. So I got there and the group was there. Just funny as we always see eachother at the gym in gym attire, not street clothes. So it was my gym buddy and his wife, the foot in mouth guy, and then 2 other girls that I talk to at the gym.

My God, the gym buddy bought all our tickets and didnt want us to pay him, and he bought us drinks and food! He was paying for everything!

You know, I dont get him. I mean maybe hes just friendly and his wife is cool with it. When any of us girls got up to use the bathroom or get a drink he walked us out, the first time I left he walked me out and grabbed my belt loop as we were walking and told me that I looked nice and that the group said “no thats not her!” when I came in, seeing me in every day clothes and my hair down. And hes all “No its her, she looks good huh?” His wife seemed cool and all. Foot in Mouth guy made raunchy sexual innuendos and jokes all night. Which he always does, even at the gym. So I had a few drinks, we all did. And I had a good time, and I wasnt sad being without a date, and I honestly enjoyed myself! I had fun! And I made smart ass jokes and innuendos right back and had the others cheering me and laughing. 🙂 It felt really good I admit. 🙂

After the rodeo they had a barn dance so we just went to watch, me and the one girl spent all eve picking out cute guys, haha, just having fun being silly. So we ended up leaving at midnight.

Gym buddy hugged me goodbye and said Good nite sweetie.

The lady passed her LAPD exam so she said she wants to take us all out to dinner some night soon to celebrate! How cool is that. Im not used to this people paying for everyone thing.

By the way. I saw the sound guy, who Ive seen at my work and written about, the guy I think thats cute and when he comes to my work I get nervous as hell! heehee. He was working security at the rodeo, so I talked to him 2 diff times. Hes got this great smile and dimples, but the talking was brief, I get so frickin nervous around him I dont know much of what to say. But other then that I didnt see anyone else there I knew. Which since I was born in this town I expected to see more, but thats ok.

I called B when I got in, oh how I would have loved to have come home to him and crawled into bed with him. I could have just drove back out, but it was late, and I told myself no, dont do all the work. Im changing that. So here I am journaling. i called him and said I had fun and we talked a bit then he went to bed. We may go work on cleaning his Jeep tomm, see how tomm goes. We gotta call eachother once one of us wakes up.

So. Im having a good weekend, life is feeling pretty nice right now. And I had a good time hanging out with others minus a partner. YAY ME!

Later allllssss