Been Da Busy Girl

Dear Diary,

Miss Me? heehee. I have to say, well for me personally, I like it when Im too busy for the computer and not spending so much time online. It feels good to be away from it to be honest.

B has been fine lately. Funny aint it? He has been calling on my busy days leaving me messages, and he seemed to want to join Jen and I friday night for drinks, but then I told him he could come out, and hes all “Im not driving out there with my car acting up” and Im all ??? What did he think we were gonna do? Come to his place to drink or something? Or that wed pick him up? HA! Noooope.

It is just interesting to be busy, and not being with him and him calling me. I have to say in some respects its nice.

I have to say when we rode the Trolley in the Santa Barbara/Montecito area, I fell in love. Ahhh if only I were rich enough to live there. I so love the old homes around there, the scenery, its so pretty. We drove by Cheryl Tiegs house, and were shown where Brad Pitt and Jennifer Anniston were married and they have a place there they said also. Also said the whales migrate up close at one point in the yr, I had no idea, would love to come and see, and the beach there called Butterfly Beach where Monarch Butterflies migrate and turn the trees orange. Also saw a Hotel Charlie Chaplin owned I forget? Owned or stayed in? And how he filmed many of his silent films over there.

We went to the mall there, and went to Victoria’s Secret and I bought some lingerie, Woohooo. God I wish I had money to throw out, Id get so many things, but that stuff can add up, but its sooo pretty!

But I did pick up a lil somethin ::Wink::

We saw Down With Love, it was cute and funny. I really enjoyed the film and want to see it again.

I dont know what it is, but theres just this feel I love in Santa Barbara, its the same feel as I get in San Diego, its like its where Im meant to be. Its how I feel, thats the type of place I want to be one day. I just wonder HOW? Financially that is.

The concert was a long day. I know if I go to one again I will go later, the bands early on are the less well knowns, not that they are bad, but its hot, its a long day and the breaks between are long. It picked up once Sugar Ray performed. And they had us all up on our feet with their fun energy. I saw them at the last Wango Tango concert yrs back, and they were excellent then.

I also like JC Chasez performance of Blowing Me Up. They had 2 high school bands and they just filled the stage, I love the sound of a live school type band. And it was choreographed really well, the band playing, the girls with the flags, then JC and his dancers, it was cool. And how exciting for the 2 highschools that one the contest to perform on stage.

Lisa Marie Presley was cute, she seemed so nervous, it was her first big stage public thing they said. She didnt say much between songs. She just said “Theres a lot of you out there” You just felt for her, wanted to reassure her that we loved her and go do your thing Lisa! Watching the corner of her lip flare up like her Dad as she sang.

Sting was good, with Craig David, Craig David sang with only a guitar player, he was really good.

Daniel Beddingfeld was good also, very high energy. A lot of fun, we all got on our feet for him too.

Christina Aguilera was super sweet, and was really touching with her words before her songs, and when she played Fighter how she got us all riled up with what the song was about and seeing everyone up singing and shouting the song along with her was cool. She sorta reminded me of Cher, with her outfit, her dark hair now and the makeup.

Nelly had everyone singing, going silent and letting the stadium sing parts of his songs to him. I love when artists do that, just let the crowd sing, I wonder what a rush that must be for the performer to hear a stadium singing their song back to them.

Brittney Spears was there, they briefly had her come out and she just said Hi and ran off. She looked different then all the fuss about her new chopped dark hair, it was longer past her shoulders and back to the more blondish color.

The American Idol 10 finalists sang “Im proud to be an American” but their mics werent up loud or they werent singing loud or something so that was kinda jipped since we couldnt hear them well. But it didnt matter, we all sang. And they kept playing the Sat Nite Live spoof of American Idol it was soo funny.

There was more, but I could go on and on. 🙂

It was fun going out to the bar friday night, drinking, listening to the band play. The bar was pretty dead actually. Some guy came and asked me if we wanted to go play pool. But we just got there and wanted to hear the music. So I said No. Then this ewww guy was hitting up all the ladies to dance, he tried Jen and I later on. I had 3 drinks, I was spinny but happy, I called B on the bathroom payphone all goofy and telling him he was sexy and I loved him. :)~

Afterwards we went to Dennys, and outside was the Hyper ADD guy from class! Im all Hey! And he said “Hey darling” or babe or something back to me. We talked briefly, he was talking about how messed up that guy was in class last week, Then i went in to sit with Jen and eat French Toast at 2am! haha.

I rarely get to just be free and go do stuff or have someone to do stuff like that with, so it was nice (Thank you Jen! YIPPIE!)

It was like we were just go go go. Friday out till 3am,passed out, got up, went to concert, got home around midnite, passed out, then today we went to the Renaissance Faire. I forgot my ID! MONEY! AND ATM! I WAS SO MADDD!

We drove an hour and a half! And Jen had $30 and her ATM was lost so she was without too! I was all DARNIT! I left them in my jeans from the concert!

Luckily we could pay for admission with her credit card and we had just enuff to eat! With $30, Im so glad! I woulda been so bummed! (Thank you Jen!!!) YAY!!!

We had the big Turkey Leg and Strawberry Crepes! The food was great and BIG! And we watched totally raunchy naughty shows! Sooo raunchy but they were great! I want to go back and I think Ill just take the kids next weekend for the last of the Faire. They will love it and they have kid shows and things, but I know they will be in awe of whats going on there. So cant wait to show it to them.

So I have my Girly dr appt tomm AM. Then we had planned to go to Hollywood. Ill see how she feels tomm and if shes up for it. Then Tuesday Im back to the old routine, work and all. Sigh,, been nice to be out of the normal schedule.

B and I talked one nite about Hawaii, how we would both like to go, and perhaps we coulda aim to go towards the end of this year! OOOOOO I would so love that!

But we shall see, depends how we are doing and how we both are financially then.

My tax refund savings is shrinking, sighhh. Ex gave me a support check today. Its the largest Ive gotten in awhile but he said to wait till tuesday, Ill go to his bank again and try to cash it (Pray it clears this time for me guys!) If it does it will SOOO HELP!

Hes up north working now, up around San Fran.

Hes so quiet now, not bugging me, not online, not calling throwing his old fits. Its nice. And we talk somewhat and its civil and nice. He told me he saw our old pastors son, Who I really miss. I was kinda bummed, I havent spoken to this guy, mailed cards and sent and email since ex and I splitting and no response from him and his wife. My ex and I spent so much time with this guy, we were next door neighbors, he was in our wedding, and when we first met he went to jail right at the time he turned his life around, and ex and I used to drive to the prison and visit him behind the window, talk to him on the phone.

I always thought he was cool, attractive, secretly I always liked him, and Ive told B, he reminds me of him. I noticed a lot of how they were alike when B and I first dated. So I guess in some way I feel I want this guys approval? How weird is that? I miss him, I looked up to this guy and respected him.

Kids are back home now, they are in a good mood. You can just see the difference now in them with my ex changing and settling and not freaking out with me over every little thing. Its good for all of us. 🙂 Wow, the drama levels are down, I just realized, I mean its just hitting me as I type this, how Im writing what things have changed at the moment. 🙂

B worked on his Jeep this weekend, its getting closer to being Done, hes so happy and Im happy for him too. Its been sitting for yrs. He said its caked in dust inside really bad he has to totally clean and detail it inside. I said I would help him, hes all “Id like that, Ill wait till your free weekend then to do it, and then ummm, Id like to see you in a white tshirt and I can get ya wet with the hose” haha I was all laughin and told him he had a deal.

You know with all the ups and downs, when I get a little time away, a little space, a little role reversal feel with him, I appreciate him more. I see some things better, and I realize how much I do like being with him despite how different we are. Yeah hes grumpy and moody at times, but at the same time he allows me to say “Your pissing me off knock it off” and doesnt blow his lid but accepts my words.

I know the movie Down with Love spoke to Jen in some ways, and the way it spoke to me was the whole GAME between the couple in it. And the whole meeting your match, and in some ways, I see the similarity in that with B and I. B likes a woman who can stand up to him, tell him she disagrees, challange him, and the more I do it, the more I am amazed at how it works for us. How I am afraid of doing so for his reaction, and in turn when I do he listens or allows me to voice how I feel in a safe place.

Who knows what will happen, but for today, Im ok, and I love him, and Im glad hes in my life.

Ok so gonna scoot for now! LATERSSSS