Little Irritable today

Dear Diary,

Im feeling kinda bleh this AM. Think I just need to eat something, just my mood is a little irritable.

And I am so frustrated with my youngest child. This constant lying is driving me nuts. He lied on thursday and threw his dinner in the trash and I found it when I looked deeper in the trash. Then he went to go see his Dad. Then last night his brother was done eating dinner, and a little later my oldest is yelling and saying the younger one put his food into his bowl and that he was finished. I believed my oldest but had to make sure, My little one swore up and down he ate his dinner also. But I know which bowl I gave to each child. And so I tried testing him for the truth, saying since I didnt know they would both be punished, because someone is lying and wont come forward.

Well when I finally said which bowl was youngest childs( he tried saying later that the unfinished bowl was his and that he didnt put it in his brothers) But it was now in the wrong bowl. I was so mad at him. He was willing to pin it on his brother and not come clean. So I made him sit down and eat every last bite, took the cookie and candy he had for snack after dinner and threw it out and told him no snacks for him. And he had to go to bed. This isnt the first time with the lying, its becoming a constant problem.

So guess what the little stinker did this AM!!!!!!!! After going to bed early last night and getting in trouble!

See I dont trust him, so I made sure to stick the candy way down in the bottom of the trash, and well, this AM I looked, and didnt find it! So I called out “Ummm where is the candy that was in the trash?” And he pulled his innocent, I dont know routine. I said “Well its not in here, go get it!” and guess who came forward with it??

So I told him once again he will be in his room after school and no playing.

Sighhhhh, I feel so mean. But I have to be consistant with him, my ex wont have them much for the next 2 weeks, so Im hoping to get him more into a routine and accountability at home. Its hard to discipline when they up and leave to the other parents place. And their Dad is the king Liar.

So Ive really got to keep on him and try and get through to him that this lying business has got to stop. I see my counselor thurs, ugh so many things to talk about!

I have dentist appt today, attny meeting tomm and my class, counselor thurs. My kids also have a program at the school thurs eve. Gonna be a busy week.

Plus when my freakin anxiety issues get in the way. Worrying about my relationship with B, my mind going nuts with things and I dont always know how to work through them or what is going on with my mind.

I went to the gym yesterday and say my gym buddy, he was gone on Jury duty. Anyways he was across the gym when he say me and waved and mouthed the words “Did you get my email?” Since I emailed him asking him where hed been (hes ALWAYS in the gym) and gives me a hard time when I dont show up, but he was out all last week.

So Im doing triceps and these other gym regular guys are to the right of me. I just nodded back to my buddy saying I got it, and I guess the guys saw us talking. I overheard the one guy say “What is it about that guy??? I dont get it!” And then the other guy I couldnt hear everything he said, but I think he said he believes the dude is gay and is every chicks friend. So the other guy is all “ooooh it makes total sense now”

Which its funny, My gym buddy isnt really hot looking or anything, but hes got one of those personalities that just draws people in, charismatic, sweet, I dont know hes just cool and he admits hes a flirt, the 3 guys he works out with give him hell for how he is with women, and to be honest, he pisses men off and makes them jealous because he pretty much makes friends with all the women in the gym. Hes never been inappropriate or hit on me directly or any of that. Hes just a good guy I think. So was just funny to hear the guys talking about him. And other part is, the guy who said “What is it about that guy?” Hes so cute, haha, hes always there when I am, we have spoken a few times just recently, but really brief. He teased me a few weeks ago when I couldnt adjust a seat and was having problems.

So Im not sure my gym schedule the next few days with all Ive got going, depends on how long appointments are and when I get out if I have time.

My ex hasnt told me he cant get the kids tomorrow night, so we shall see. He said he doesnt want them overnight, but I never spoke back to him regarding that, Tough, I have my college class, its his night, I cant worry about it all for him. He needs to write me and say he cant come so I can have other arrangements for the kids while Im at school, or he can figure out a way to take care of them.

Anyways, thats all for now