After all that I last wrote, I thinking I started to just hear myself, hear myself crying each day, heck Ive been crying since I was a grade school girl. I want a boyfriend! Waaaa. Ive been journaling since Jr High and its pretty much the focus of everything I write. HAVING A GUY.
Im wearing myself out!
So I was sitting there today thinking “Dammit Victoria, look at how much energy you put forth each day thinking, worrying about, talking to men?” Why not put your energy into some other things that wont upset you or confuse you, why not pursue some new interests, enjoy yourself in other areas, find things to fill your time so you arent always dwelling on GUYS.
So today I looked up a place for vocal lessons. I found one on the net. But thought, why wait? Why call? I drove over right after work and inquired. 🙂 So I got the brochure, the info, the price and all that. So now I just gotta save up the money to start. It shouldnt take me too long. Hopefully within a month. And I will do one months worth of lessons and give it a try and see what I think.
Its not a lot but its a start right?
Went to the gym today, Im pushing myself, Ive gone every day this week so far. I have to for my sanity right now.
Its just gonna suck cause Im gonna be strapped money wise for 4 weeks, until I get over the hump of my mortgage payment. I really wish I was getting my support. I got a letter in the mail yesterday of the Wage Assignment. HA! It was finally issued to my Ex’s employer. But not gonna do any good now since he was fired. So his old boss should have gotten it.
I also was reading some and talked to my sister about going to the DA. I was thinking exactly what she said. I read on the DA sight about going after a non paying parent, hes unemployed right now and they can fill out something and get the support lowered, my sis said this did happen with her and she told me its best to leave my support order ALONE, and not push things, let him get another job, just let the amount he owes add up. And so thats what Im doing, going after him right now wont get me anything right now as it is with him out of work. So just let the amounts add up. I am going on month 3 now of nothing.
Talked to music dude earlier today. He said he slept late today and was late getting his daughter to preschool. I guess his ex’s parents paid for this really nice private school for her in the Hollywood area. Well he said they totally lectured him today for being late and it pissed him off. I said “Is it a upper class snooty school?” Hes all “OH YEAH” He then responded with “Sorry I dont have a Nanny with a range rover to drop her off” LOL I asked him if he was late before or anything and he said No. Hes like “Victoria, its freakin preschool cmon now!” He said he called his Ex up to tell her about them getting all in his face. He said “Did I tell you that my ex came over and we spent monday eve with our daughter?” I said No do tell. He said they had a great eve, his ex made dinner, they both put their little girl to bed, then went on the back porch, smoked pot(yeah pot) and talked for 3 hours and laughed. He said they talk about their current love lives with eachother. He said he can say stuff like “You know I dont even find you attractive anymore?” and she will just laugh. He said she asked him “Was I good in bed?” He said “No, not really” and he said they can just laugh about that stuff together. Its really weird to hear. They are really working together for this kid. And they plan things together with her. Which I think is awesome. I told him I cant even fathom having that. They did go through a painful split, early last year, I was friends with him all during it, but i just look at how quickly things are peaceful between them. Im envious. Wish I could have that.