Sad

Dear Diary,

Im so hurt and pissed off right now. I wish I could just turn and walk away from B and just let him go.

I hate this, I just want the man to show some damn iniative and I told him that last night. I told him I need that, he needs to CALL. He needs to ask me things, confirm things, not just be this indifferent puppy who says What was that? Oh I dont care?

I just want to hear, I miss you, I want to see you. And for it to be followed up THEN with actions. Not to hear the words for a week then lame actions follow. Then to come home to get an email tonight saying he went out with people from work, but to page him? To say if its cool he calls me later?

Hes always been ok to call. I have told him this over and over.

And I dont wanna hear how he went out with people at work. Yeah dammit I wanna hear how bad he wants to see me and what hes gonna do about it. Not wait cowering for my invites. I WANT THE MAN TO SHOW SOME DAMN INIATIVE!!!!!!

I want him to call me when he got off work and say I miss you can I come over. Then be here. Thats what I want.

And Im just so hurt, I keep telling myself to spend the day with Mr C tomm at the pool and his place and all with the kids. I need to stop waiting around for B. Ive wasted half my weekend as it is. When all I wanted was to see B early on friday and have a nice time. Weekend will be over , Im just frustrated, pissed off, sad, hurt,

B : (