Thinks She Has Access?

Dear Diary,

Well Mr C called me last night, we were commenting on our sunburns and feeling drained. He was then heading out to go to a movie.

I finally was feeling somewhat energetic and cleaned up the house a little and unpacked all our things from our trip.

B came online later and we discussed him coming over. He arrived about 10pm. We sat in the living room and watched tv. He looked so good. I just stared at him on the couch, he was wearing jeans, a maroon colored shirt and his Doc Martins, and he smelled of Sandalwood. I was sitting next to him and just looked over at his arms, they are so wonderful, just the way he looks, the way his veins show. I touched his arm and the hair on them is so soft, his hands are so soft, hes very big on taking care of himself and it shows. I lifted his sleeve a bit and exposed his tattoo of the tribal band. Did I say how good he looks?

So we just sat side by side snuggly on the couch, he finally got to see an episode of the Osbournes.

He stayed over, I was so exhausted and just wanted to pass out. And he just held me. No sexual contact or anything. And he was off early this AM and I headed to work.

I got my cell phone and Mr C had called me last nite about 11:30.

Well this is the big week, mediation one day, court the next, ex in town for a week, I was a bit annoyed with him yesterday since he goes through the kids and tells them when hes going to see them instead of planning it with me first. He wanted to take them for a few hours after the mediation and between his court date for an order to show cause for his behavior and all that. I didnt think its wise he see the kids in between court visits. Let him clear his head somewhat since he overreacts and is irrational to begin with. So I told him the weekend would be fine to see the kids, he got really pissy with me over me not saying wed was ok.

In Law called again with a sort of snotty message saying KIDS CALL ME, you can call me you know? I dont get these people, leave me alone, your trying to make my life a hell and put drama in it, you have no rights to these kids woman. Why not try and contact them when they are with your son and knock it off?

I cant wait till we get through all of this in court, its just ridiculous, I really want nothing to do with her now. I spent 12 yrs calling her weekly, sharing my heart, tears, fears, being afraid of her son, talking to her about my therapy, sending photos of the kids, making trips, inviting her to watch the birth of our last. I was a good daughter in law, and I thought we had a good relationship. But the second her son and I werent together, she changed on me, shes been negative to me since. And its just so baffling because my ex and her were never close, I was the glue all those years. And now shes trying to make my life hell?

My ex is calling me and telling me “My mom says your arent letting her talk to the kids and wont let them see her again, and she keeps calling but you dont call back” Yes she has called, the last time we spoke she said “I didnt call to speak to you but your child” and then refused to not discuss or divorce issues with the kids, Ex tells me she is sorry and knows that was wrong, I told him I havent heard that from her and that I want it in writing. Nothing, and so she keeps calling but specifically leaving messages for the kids. Im the mother, these are small children, she doesnt have her own access. fuck that