Should I Go?

Dear Diary,


Well Im sitting here debating on going to DisneyLand or not. I have a free pass that expires July 5th. I really want to go, talked to the sitter and she could watch the kids this weekend for a day. But who shall I go with? Disneyland is around $50 now. Already talked to B, hes working and said his finances are tapped. Which I figured. I dont really have any local girlfriend who can go, minus children. And the point of this is for me to get away and not have to pay either. My kids will be costly to take. I can go for free. So if I find a friend who wants to go and pay, then woohoo!


Im tempted to ask Mr. Comedian. He used to work for Disneyland years ago as Tigger. 🙂 And I know he would be such a blast to go with, but then explaining about my new guy pal to B?


Its really weird. Mr Comedian and I have a lot of things in common. We just found out the other night we can both do Howie Mandell “Bobby” impersonations. This among so many other commanlities we have. Such as our opinions on medication these days, hes writing a screenplay on this, and we had this big talk and its just an area where we both related so well. Each time I tell him this stuff he says “Shit! Your scaring me!” and the “Bobby” voice freaked him out since we both have done it for years and were sitting there telling eachother little “Bobby” voice , potty stuff( dont ask unless you know this bit Howie does)


Otherwise if I cant find someone to go with Im thinking of trying to sell it for half price, but time is short so I gotta figure this out fast!


Ive gotta go buy a new answering machine, mine is digital and maxed out with messages from ex and kids I want to save. So I need something with a tape. Im just ignoring the ex now I guess. It just is so stupid and I get so drawn in all the time. So Im trying to just distance myself best I can this week. I need to move forward with my own life, let the fun girl I have inside return with her smiles and enjoyment for life. And not walking around bogged with the ex issues. Sure they will arise, but as long as they get to me, and keep me down, my ex will keep at it. When he sees I dont care, then he will loose his motivation when I just distance myself as best as I can. But yes its hard when you have an emotional tie and 12 yrs with a person to totally severe it all totally and completely. There are always going to be stings and hurts. But its me learning to take them and accept them(ouch thats a hard one!)

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