Ex’s are Ugly

Well the children visited their Father.

Its nice to have them back. Im always worried about what they will come back with. When I say that I mean what has happened mentally. They are young and I dont appreciate my Ex putting them in the middle of things. I had called him tonight because he didnt leave the money which he is to pay for the childrens insurance policy. We both agreed to switch them to my work policy and that he would pay me their portion. Thus this frees him from paying for me any longer and getting a cheaper and MUCH Better policy than the one he had for them.

He had said he would give me the payment, they will be without insurance come the 1st since he pulled us all off his policy. So I called and asked if he was leaving the payment for me. His response “NO, IM NOT LEAVING IT WITH YOU!”

God I hate this, the games. The manipulations. Its your childrens health insurance for Gods sakes! Grow up for once and pull your head out of your ass.

I told him he can just make the check out to my boss if he is concerned about giving me a check. He said “NO! I will talk to your boss about it” And I just had to say Ok and hang up. Further feeling upset inside.

Abusers seek to control, and he tries every area he can to do so. It can really mess with a persons head. Dr Jeckyl Mr Hyde. One day he is sweet and apologetic, next hes just a total jerk.

My Mother informed me he called her back today for his outburst and apologized. He did this once before in the past, Apologized in front of me to her about something he did to me and her. Then hugged her and totally shunned me. I know this game well also. Trying to gather people to his side. But it is my Mom dear. MY MOM. And my sister married a man and divorced him who did all these same games. But I can still see at times my Ex works that charm. Why else did I stay around for so long with his abuse? He is a con man. Its all an act. To gain what he wants. CONTROL.

As me and the children drove home one said “Mom? Why dont you want to see Dad?”

I sat there and just wanted to say “Because your father treats me terribly and hurts me” But I also think of the court papers that say not to make derogatory comments about the other parent. So I did my best to explain that Mom doesnt want to fight, and sometimes its best if people have a little space so that they dont fight, sort of like he and his sibling when they bicker and I send them to play in their own rooms for awhile.

They seemed ok with my answer. But then they said “Dad wants to see you” And that just pissed me off inside. Why does he say such things? Meanwhile hes threatening me on the phone, and then in front of them, then next telling them there Mom wont see him and how much he wants to see me. See how abusive all this is mentally? Its very confusing and you never know whats up. His Mindset.

Then the kids talked of going out of state to visit him. That is not cool with me in the slightest. That will be taken up with the attorney. Im not letting my children who are both under the age of 7 going across country with a man who forgets his own children in store aisles when he is visiting. A man who isnt here to visit them but once every month and a half for 2 days, then tells me he feels detached from them. And then let them go that far away? GOD NO!

I worry about him fighting these things, but I do know enough now that I am a good Mom and I have taken care of them. He will not look well for his behavior and involvement since our marital split.

Well I hope this is it with the Ex. I pray to God I dont have to deal with him tommorow. For some reason I believe he may show up at work tommorow.

I just dont want to see him. He has become such an ugly person in my eyes.